Generally, dark humour makes fun of topics that are considered taboo. For instance, they can make light of topics such as death, racism, war, and sexuality, which is not always a fun topic to discuss. Thus, dark humour jokes are not for everyone. Nonetheless, a little humour goes a long way and a giggle a day keeps the doctor away.
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Most of the time, dark jokes make people uncomfortable. However, if you can twist them well, one will absolutely laugh and even learn one or two things from the jokes. In addition to being a little creative, you should know your audience well because these are not your normal jokes.
Funniest dark humour jokes
In most cases, a few people find black comedy funny because they go too far. However, comedy is a different field and can make fun of anything to make people laugh. So check out these funny but dark humour jokes to have a good laugh and get some conversation going.
I just read that someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds. Poor guy.The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.Tombstone engraving: I TOLD you I was sick.My daughter asked me how stars die. "Usually an overd*se," I told her.You are not completely useless. You can always serve as a bad example.A man walked into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said, “no way, you will not bring it back!”To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they do not live in a swing state.What is the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player showers.You know you are getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you are down there.The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it.My grief counsellor died the other day. He was so good at his job I do not even care.Why were the orphan's first phone an iPhone X? Because there was no home buttonThe doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.“I am sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.I just came across my wife’s Tinder profile and am so angry about her lies. Honestly, she is not “fun to be around”.Something bad was about to happen. My wife was being clever again.I just got my doctor's test results, and I'm really upset about it. Turns out I'm not going to be a doctor.I admire these phone hackers. I think they have a lot of patience. I cannot even be bothered to check my OWN voicemails.I heard Sony is coming out with a new video game console to help us get through the pandemic. It's called the Plaguestation 5.PAY ATTENTION: Never miss breaking news – join Briefly News' Telegram channel!
Best dark humour jokes
If you have not found the best dark humour joke yet, here is another list to consider. They are funny but a little uncomfortable to tell to some people. So choose wisely.
I do not have a carbon footprint. I just drive everywhere.If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.Today, I asked my phone, “Siri, why am I still single?” and it activated the front camera.Why did the man miss the funeral? He wasn’t a mourning person.I visited my new friend in his apartment. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.What is the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.They laughed at my crayon drawing. I laughed at their chalk outline.They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.Why does Dr Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I do not find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.I have many jokes about unemployed people, but sadly none of them works.Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend." Do it at home, and you are "destroying evidence."What’s worse than biting into an apple and discovering a worm? Biting into an apple and discovering half a worm.My favourite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I love a protagonist with a twisted backstory.Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.Why is the USA bad at chess? They have already lost 2 towers.Hilarious dark humour twisted jokes
Laughing at black humour jokes can be regarded as insensitive by others. However, you should know that these jokes are not meant to provoke or insult anyone.
My parents raised me as an only child, which really angered my brother.As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice. You can either be right, or you can be happy.The older you get, the better you get. Unless you are a banana.Be wise because the world needs wisdom. If you cannot be wise, pretend to be someone wise, and then just behave as they would.I have a joke about trickle-down economics. But 99 per cent of you will never get it.The doctor gave me some cream for my skin rash. He said I was a sight for psoriasis.Do not challenge death to a pillow fight. Unless you are prepared for the reaper cushions.The most corrupt CEOs are the ones who run pretzel companies. They are always so twisted.I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This is not working.” I am not sure what she is talking about. I opened the fridge door, and it is working fine!Imagine if you walked into a bar and there was a long line of people waiting to hit you. That is the punch line.What is the difference between Iron man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero, and the other is a simple command.You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.You can’t say that Hitler was bad through and through. He did kill Hitler, after all.What do you call it when every one of your friends makes too many dumb COVID jokes? A pun-demic.An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day. It was impossible to put down.Why did the old man fall into the well? Because he could not see that well.Why do vampires seem sick? They are always coffins.My grandma has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.Deep dark quotes about life
It is good for one to take life seriously, but adding some little fun to it makes it worthwhile living. And these jokes are all you need.
Why are friends a lot like snow? If you pee on them, they disappear.Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed.Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.My wife is mad that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.Life is like coffee, the darker it gets, the more it energizes.Prejudice is a great time-saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts.Life is hard. After all, it kills you.People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.If, at first, you do not succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a d*mn fool about it.Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe.When I was growing up, I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.Why take hours to drown when you can do it in a minute? Death can be kind if you allow it to be sometimes.I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, s*x, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.Always borrow money from a pessimist. He will not expect it back.I am a marvellous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.If, at first, you do not succeed, blame your parents.Despite my ghoulish reputation, I really have the heart of a small boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk.Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.What is the whole point of being pretty on the outside when you’re so ugly on the inside?Very dark humour jokes
The fact that making jokes about taboo subjects are forbidden, these jokes will put a smile on your face no matter how hard you try not to. Have a look!
What do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip-off.If you cannot be kind, at least be vague.My therapist told me, “time heals all wounds!”. I stabbed him. Now we are waiting.Did Jesus die a virg*n? No, he got nailed before he died.Welcome to Dave’s orphanage. You make it, we take itCremation: My last hope for a smoking hot body.I remember all the people I lost along the way as I get older. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.I am confident my last words will be, “Are you f*cking kidding me?!”What part of a vegetable can you not eat? The wheelchair.A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I?Do you know the phrase “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure”? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted.If you donate one kidney, everybody celebrates you as a total hero. But donate five, and suddenly everyone is yelling.My psychiatrist told me I was crazy, and I said I want a second opinion. He said, ‘okay, you are ugly too."Just say NO to dr*gs!" If I'm talking about my dr*gs, I probably already said yes.What flour do orphans use when baking? Self-Raising.Knock knock. orphan: Who is there? Not your parentsWhat do all suicide bombers have in common? None of them is willing to die alone.Why cannot Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school? Because he is dead.My mom died when we could not remember her blood type. As she died, she kept telling us to “be positive,” but it is hard without her.Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You will be next!” They soon stopped, though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.Indeed, dark humour quotes are not everyone’s cup of tea. Some people will find them funny, while others will find them offensive because they touch on highly sensitive topics. However, they are meant to be fun. After all, life is for the living, and you do not have to take everything seriously. They say laughter is the best medicine, and it increases lifespan!
READ ALSO: Inspiring Nelson Mandela quotes on education, leadership and life
We published an inspirational post about Nelson Mandela’s quotes. Mandela was one of South Africa’s greatest leaders. He led a movement that saw the end of apartheid in the 20th century. For this reason, he is remembered for many things.
Many people find inspiration in his wise words on various life aspects. In particular, he gave many quotes on leadership, life, and education before his death. So you can also have a look at them to get some inspiration.
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